Dinner
Simple pasta dinner, in detail angel hair and Newman’s Own spicy italian sauce.
On angel hair box I am told: Pasta and Other Complex Carbohydrates are the Preferred Fuel for the Brain and Body which is what I think I will respond with if anyone ever rags on carbohydrates around me again. Do you know it is hard for me to spell brain, as my brother’s name is Brian? It is hard to spell that too. Well, anyway… It sounds exactly like what I need. and lots of it.
I have been feeling so stupid, so clumsy, so needing an anti-hex spell lately. Having many headaches. (maybe not enough complex carbohydrates?) Really seriously considering the possibility of having been hexed. It’s just little things… getting caught on things, losing balance suddenly, trying over and over to push my hair behind my ears but instead unravelling it all, going to turn on a light that is already on, can’t concentrate at all, can’t sculpt mentally like I normally can. Yesterday as I was handing a receipt off to a customer I managed somehow to grab one tucked underneath (waiting for tip adjustment) the debit terminal and then hit the button to open the till, all in one gesture meant only to deliver the one paper slip. My house needs cleaning and organizing desperately but I can’t comprehend where to begin. It’s like this army of curse-ants, they are all very tiny but when they come all at once they gnaw on me all over until I am a crying unproductive mess. You can imagine what the interaction with keyboard is like. Well, if the carbohydrates don’t work then I will rake Craigslist for a shaman. Or at least ramen.
Mike Gravel is the only politician I’ve ever liked, and I wholly like him. I would vote for him for anything in a heartbeat. Even though he dropped out I would still write him in, if I could vote in the U.S.
But today on the phone my daddy asked me, knowing the answer of course but wanting, oh, I don’t know, what do daddies want when they ask you these things? whether I thought Obama or McCain would make the better president. I thought I would have to think hard about a witty, or at least catty response, but what came out of me without nor needing my consent was: “That’s easy: Obama, because he at least is running on behalf of all the American people, while McCain is definitely only running on behalf on some of the American people.” By definition, a good American president should be a guardian for every American!! Not just the straight ones, not just the white ones, not just the ones who own cars, not just the ones who don’t educate themselves, not just the post secondary-educated ones.
Truly, Obama would unite where McCain would divide. Which is actually the only path to sustainability, which is what this culture really needs more than anything policy-related… because it is or is not the foundation for policy, without it… it’s like a handled ring without a net in it, you can’t catch butterflies that way.
But that’s just my opinion, someone who wants to live in simple peace and good health with some physical pleasureable embellishment - generally, high-quality things, but few - and enough money to see all my loved ones a few times a year. A few less of the bits where I get pulled over by police on my bike and threatened with arrest for riding in a whole lane of a three-lane road (perfectly legally) because I can’t travel at the speed of cars (because my legs aren’t gasoline-fueled engines and/or it’s early in the season for me), and my bicyclist husband gets some serious dances with death thrown at him by men with pick-up trucks instead of penises and the police say they can do nothing with their license plate numbers.
But I suppose I need that to know me?
I am amidst a phase of severe computer instability, or internet at least. Hence there was no follow-up to the maple cookie recipe, but they were quite good (rolled too thin though, and I think I would use all maple sugar) and followed by a coconut oat chocolate chip cookie batch. (Which was the real winner! The dry, flaky coconut gave the edges the most scrumptious cripsness.) If I leave this computer, no matter for how short or long a moment, the connection is dead until the machine has finished rebooting. This is the common variable in connection-deaths that I have found: not how long has the computer been on, but rather, oops walked away for a moment. I went just to stir my pasta, and it died. Maybe it is in love with me? Don’t leave me, baaaaby~! Yes that must be it. Except I did try reasoning lasciviously with my cell phone whose charge lasts 2 days and 6 hours (ugh) and it hasn’t behaved any better, soo…
The pasta has made me feel better, but the sleepiness is kicking in. Eating pasta is like doing pot but not getting high, just coming down.
Taking off the socks makes me feel even better.
Why did I get so many forks? I only needed one.
!
I guess much of this is just rambling thoughts, and I want to document them because right now I feel like a mental person trapped inside a very primally-functioning body. So it’s an attempt at regaining mental control. I think my brain is high on some kind of chemical imbalance, because it’s kind of fun.
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